F--fight

oh well well everything is being mixed up and turned far from what we've planned.

someone fell and hit the bottom rock and feel like crap.

when you just want to puke and throw up every time you remember your first plan because it didn't ran great.

when something you reaaaally put a hope just turn 180 degrees.

you remembered your sweats, your struggled, your fight, and how it became meaningless for now.

your tiredness, the money you've spent for that, the tears that felt not only from your eyes, but also from your parents, all the people you love.

Godness seriously, i never experience that kind of situation.

is it the way you make me feel so right now?

not for my own self, but for the people who is precious for me, a person who i build a dream together with. you know when he feel like crap, i do too. when he feel like dying because he can not do anything except giving up, i.. seriously feel the same too.

i know, from today on, our journey will be a thousand time harder.

this is perhaps just a beginning.

and i need to deal with that. i need to feel how it is when you need to fail. i need to feel how it is to giving up on something you've fight for but it did not work.

it is enough for being angry and deny everything.

it is enough to put a blame to unreasonable thing.

well, i think, this is a time to be.. stronger?

alright, just do it, then.